Helpfully labeled “satire” on Juan Cole’s Informed Consent:
David Gregory’s Meet the Press today hosted a debate between Bill Nye the Science Guy and Texas Rep. Louie Gohmert (R-TX) on whether gravity is just a theory.
“Sure,” Gohmert said, “things fall down all the time. But that doesn’t mean gravity is a law. Look at the Leaning Tower of Pisa. It’s still there after hundreds of years. Things don’t always fall down.”
Nye pointed out that Isaac Newton discovered the law of gravity in the 17th century and it is settled science.
Gohmert challenged Nye’s certainty. “The cultists who tout science always speak as though we know for sure that scientific discoveries are true. Gravity has only been theorized for a couple hundred years. It’s too early to tell. How much money do they want us to waste on suspension bridges and other expensive technology aimed at keeping things from falling down, on the basis of a theory?”
Nye tore off his bow-tie and began chewing on it in frustration.
“Wasn’t it an apple that hit Newton on the head?” Gohmert asked. “Well, I’ve read the Bible and I know that an apple was used to tempt Eve. Maybe the Serpent was just tempting Newton with a secular humanist theory.”
Nye said, “What?”
Besides,” Gohmert went on, “we all saw that movie ‘Gravity.’ Obviously there’s no gravity in outer space. So if the theory doesn’t work everywhere, there must be something wrong with it.”
“The law of gravity says,” Nye replied, “that ‘any two bodies in the universe attract each other with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them.’ Gravity works in deep outer space, it is just that bodies there are distant from the earth. And in ‘Gravity’ they were just falling around the earth, in the grip of its gravity.”
Moderator David Gregory smirked. “That’s a lot of verbiage there, Bill. If you can’t explain something clearly, maybe it’s because there’s something wrong with the theory.”
Gohmert angrily interrupted Gregory. “Besides, we all know that Muslims believe in gravity. That should make you suspicious of it, right there.”
Nye turned to Gregory. “How can you call yourself a journalist? This is a carnival with a bearded lady exhibit!”
Gregory shrugged. “Next you’ll be saying Glenn Greenwald is a journalist. I am not an activist. I don’t know whether gravity is universal. I let both sides tell their story.”
“That’s not a ‘side’! He’s just mouthing nonsense! It doesn’t even make any sense.”
Gohmert pounded the table. “This whole gravity thing is just a way for scientists to get taxpayers’ hard-won money away from them. NASA wouldn’t get all that funding for rocket fuel if people realized that ‘gravity’ is just a theory.”
Gregory turned to the camera and smiled. “There you have it, folks. Next week on ‘Meet the Press:’ A quarter of Americans think the sun goes around the earth. Could they be right? To explain, we’ll be joined by a homeless man who says he is possessed by the spirit of the ancient astronomer Ptolemy.”
Stay tuned. We haven’t heard the last of this long overdue debate.
OMFG. The stupid burns beyond belief.
It’s almost like trying to play tic-tac-toe with a pigeon, except that the pigeon has a far better chance of winning.
Is this a modern day US version of a Monty Python sketch ? seems a bit dated now, but I still like it:
A CC favorite. A few of us have unofficially crowned a certain someone with “the Black Knight do Denialism” Award.
Actually, we need several categories of Black Knight—DB, EP, and Omno are different enough to warrant that.
I came across a “new” trailer for that movie and it looks awesome!!
It is awesome, but the old clip is the one with the real message for us on Crock. It depicts OUR Black Knights of AGW Denial perfectly.
Ha Ha. You almost had me there. It’s April fools day come early.
Gravity is in God’s hands!
Great stuff! Right up there with The Onion and Duffel Blog.
Everyone does know what will happen next, don’t they?
A couple of right wing-nut political and anti-science/climate change denialist sites will stumble upon this and repost it with titles like “One of God’s chosen ones defeats a disciple of Satan in debate”, or “Gravity Hoax exposed again”, and likely with a few references to global warming, Al Gore, godless Muslims, illegal immigrants, moochers, and the need to impeach “that Kenyan in the White House” cleverly woven into the narrative.
Other sites in the circular firing squad of ignorance that is the right wing-nut blogosphere will pick it up and repost it endlessly. It will die out after many dozens of postings, but will resurface years later and at intervals after that, perhaps with “Ronald Reagan was our finest President” added on. It will be edited to include only the Gomer’s comments and cited as proof positive that gravity is a hoax.
I am NOT kidding. This has happened with several Onion articles, and they don’t seem to be getting any smarter over there in La-La Land. Just take a look at Dave Burton, E-Pot, and O-Log for proof that humor, irony, and satire are beyond their comprehension.
PS I forgot to say that I know all this is true because I know several folks who will send it to me in emails with “SEE, SEE!” as the subject line, some within weeks of its first posting, others 2 or 3 years later.
Bill Nye needs to laugh at comedy not try and reason with it! Reasoning with comedy just has the joke seem sensible! If your a fool that is, who can’t tell up from down or should that be up from falling down?
What is worlds greatest country doing, being ruled by fools? It makes the population look like dills for voting for them.
The fossil fuel lobbyists seem to choose really dumb reps so they can tell them what to think, unimpeded by anything as inhibiting as a science education!
The republicans seem to be taken over by half-wits!
I remember when I was a boy when Republicans were able to say a sensible thing every now and again. I guess that IQ just got in the way of politics.
Well (and that’s a deep subject and often dry) the jury is still out on gravity. Gohmert may be closer to the truth than he understands.
Consider that Al Einstein’s musings about Special and General Relativity a century ago actually superceded Newton’s Law of Gravity, replacing it with a notion of ripples in the space-time continuum.
I found this video helpful in visualizing the concept:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0rocNtnD-yI
As far as I can tell, those who are skeptical about Newton’s explanation have science on their side. Just not for the reasons ascribed to Rep. Gohmert et al.
Thanks to the BBC I’ve learned something new. Gravity is 80% CGI, or computer generated imagery. Who knew?
Newton must be rolling in his grave. (A trivial effect to achieve today, by the way.)
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/technology-26291673
While the UK begins to see its “soggiest bog” world title slip downstream, California is being forced to share its premiere billing in the dessication derby with Brazil.
http://www.npr.org/2014/02/23/280770928/drought-could-drain-more-than-brazils-coffee-crop